Friday, 19 August 2011

Depression, exercise and damn it the doctors are telling the truth...

When I turned 44 in June (so not that long has passed) I was getting puffed out going upstairs (and I don't mean running).  I was tired ALL the time - if I had a day without a good long nap (or more than one) I was ... well, I don't know because there wasn't a day without a nap.  So naturally, when I started going to the gym it was the lightest weights, shortest and slowest distances and rightly so.  To my amazement I've managed to increase things and speed up beyond my wildest expectations. I started out struggling to walk for ten minutes non-stop - today I ran for 8 out of my 10 minutes on the running machine.  It is smallfry to many people but massively exciting to me. The result has been the weightloss - which I have to say I wouldn't have given two hoots about if I hadn't have been told to lose it health-wise.  I did my fair share of crash diets and yo-yo-ing 25 years ago!  I'm not particularly vain - no more than anyone else I know, and I am lucky enough to have a partner who is happy with whatever size or shape I am so long as I'm content and not stressing about it.  I've been overweight for a good few years now and as many women of my age come to do, I'd kind of learned to appreciate all its curves for the battle-scars, love-handles etc that they were.  Life is too short to stress about a few lumps and bumps - but if those lumps and bumps are making it shorter then I guess you have to think again. I digress..

So, weightloss notwithstanding, there's the whole energy/mood thing that is way more exciting.  I am sleeping like a log - amazing, clear, good dreams (although some are very chicken based - which is totally due to my straightforward love of my hens, nothing pervy!).  When I wake up, not only am I in a great mood I stay in a good mood. I have started the VERY slow process of reducing the dose of the anti-depressants that was increased last winter after the worst bout of depression in my life so far - and there have been a few.  I have taken them on and off (mainly on) since about 1996 and they've done a splendid job and seen me through some pretty horrible times so I have no idea if I will ever manage without them (and I don't feel that it would be essential to - they do a good job, why stress?) but reducing the dose is something even 6 months ago would have seemed impossible.  I will take it slowly - lowering the dose too quickly can cause the most appalling backlash and I just don't want to rock my boat (or Frankie's) right now... 

When my dissertation is finished (nope - not done yet - still going! Tick-tock...) I will blog more about diet and what I have learned/read/discovered.  There's a LOT of rubbish out there and a lot of sense.  Thank goodness I have a Pip to guide me on that side of things (she told me stuff two years ago that my doctor is only just beginning to recommend now... genius!).  I think it will be useful for some - well, I hope so.

So, that's my today blog.  Energy levels, mood and stamina up. Blood sugar down (5.3 on waking this morning which ROCKS!)

Hoping everyone who deserves to has a marvellous day and those who don't learn something.

S xx